We're not sure why "two for the price of one" is such a popular way to get people to buy things. If we didn't want one of something why would we suddenly want more than one of them? Though this is usually used on television to sell citrus-based cleaning products, it has spread to the auto market. You've probably heard about the dealership in Illinois selling a Chrysler Pacifica at MSRP ($39,000) and throwing in a lightly used 2008 PT Cruiser for $1. It looks like it worked because three people took them up on the offer. It's not a great deal when you consider that no one, ever, has paid full price for a Chrysler Pacifica. Today, Didorosi wrote about a real instance of a fake-sounding event from The Fast And The Furious, which is like two-for-one if you think about it. You get both Fast and Furious. And with Dearthair and TheEastBayKid, we get two COTDs for the price of one.
First, from Dearthair:
Oh I love Fast and the Furious! It's like a giant game of MadLibs!"You almost had me? You never had me - you never had your car... [slang term for negative driving action], not [slang term for positive driving action] like you should. You're lucky that [automotive performance item/action/part] didn't blow the [automotive engine part] on the [larger automotive part]! You almost had me?"
"You tell him [long-form tough-guy character-name]. Get out of here!"
"Now, me and [tough-sounding sidekick nickname] got to [automotive repair action] the [automotive part]... and replace the [smaller automotive part] you [impossible action done to smaller automotive part that majority of audience won't notice]. Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you [cliché] [cliché] or [cliché]. [Cliché] is [cliché]."
Followed by TheEastBayKid
"You almost had me? You never had me - you never had your car... [building subpar machines in the 70s, 80s, and 90s], not [planning for long-term success] like you should. You're lucky that [mismanagement] didn't blow the [pensions] on the [entire UAW]! You almost had me?""You tell him [Bob Lutz]. Get out of here!"
"Now, me and [Rick Wagoner] got to [beg the US Congress]... and replace the [profits] you [steadily whittled away by building undesirable cars until the momentum was too much to overcome even with much-improved products like the Malibu]. Ask any racer. Any real racer. It don't matter if you [blame the Prius] [blame the housing crunch] or [blame the economy as a whole]. [A poorly-run car company] is [a poorly-run car company]."
We can't top that.
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